As some of the readers may remember I have just managed to acquire a fair amount of free wood. The reason why I am chuffed with myself is primarily that these (Alien) trees were destined for a land fill. Not to mention with a medium amount of effort as well as a low cost to myself I managed to get it home.
The real challenge started last week when I had to start chopping it all up into usable pieces. This is when the story became a bit more interesting.
Its the middle of winter here and the last week has been a bit rainy so I have chopping as the weather allows. Funny thing is when your alone chopping away taking short breaks I started to notice little animals coming to investigate the goings on. One in particular was this little bird. I am not really a “bird guy” and to be honest I have no idea what type of bird this is.(Sorry)
This guy was very shy at first, keeping a safe distance at all times. When I would take a break move away from the chopping stump he would fly in and scratch through the chips looking for wood worms that live in the bark and soft outer layer of the Stone Pine. Each day I chopped he would appear and it very quickly became a bit of a game. ( It was a great distraction for the task at hand) I would chop a bit till I found a worm then stop and stand back, He would fly in grab the worm then fly back to his perch and wait. (This bird has now manipulated me into smashing great chunks of wood apart looking for worms while he sits and waits). Its official I have been duped.
Early Sunday morning I was woken up buy a weird fluttering and chirping at my window. Don’t get me wrong I don’t wake up grumpy but I am defiantly more of a night person so needless to say I was not super excited to see what all the ruckus was about. I assumed it was some kind of altercation in the bird bath outside (Don’t ask, that’s for another time). I was shocked to find this little feathered tyrant standing outside my door giving me the stink eye. ( At this stage I am horrified to admit it, I have started talking…Hmmmm maybe even more like ranting at this bird)
If you cant picture the scene, I am standing at my door in my shorts first thing in the morning negotiating my work schedule with a 15gram bird. Something to the effect of( Its Sunday morn, its just rained, I will chop a bit later. Be patient… your like a slave driver. Aaaagghh) No good will come from this, it feels like I have lost my mind. I am half asleep, barefoot, shouting a bird at sunrise on a Sunday morn.
A few hours past whilst enjoying a great snooze so I decided to go down and see my parents and have a coffee. Climbing in my truck and preparing to start I look through my windscreen to see… You guessed it. This bad mannered flying dictator has landed on my bonnet and is staring at me. His black beady eyes unflinching, unforgiving, refusing me any quarter. Its like a stand off from some old Hitchcock movie. Its official.. I am being stalked… I am being stalked by a angry bird. Even when I started the engine he stood fast. Only when I reversed did he fly off.
Long story short after a hour or so racked with guilt, I returned and started chopping all the while under avian supervision. He became so brazen landing on my chopping stump whilst I was still busy, forcing me to wait till he was done.
I was starting to wonder if he would be able to even fly after all he ate. Through the coarse of the week this bird has eaten well. He has morphed from a sweet nimble slim bird into a fat flying mafia boss.
Again with the evil staring, So full but never happy.
Now that the job at hand is virtually finished best I go and find some more wood to chop, or I will probably be in Big Trouble.
Thanks for reading.